don't you dare
by vitaminhershey
Summary: lucy just wanted to get back to her flash episode. Instead, she's stuck in the zombie apocalypse with a pyromaniac, a freak of nature, the fencing captain, and the sweetest angel to ever cross the earth. go figure. pairings; nearly non existent, but nalu and gruvia will be frequent.
1. Chapter 1

notes: i'm lame, and i'm jumping onto the zombie bandwagon that everyone else got on in like, _2014._

disclaimer: natsu dragneel and gray fullbuster would _not_ have suffered that much if I owned fairy tail, and we know it.

dedication: to my neighbor that i used to walk home with. thanks for basically planning out how we're gonna survive the zombie apocalypse.

warning: mentioned gore, swearing

* * *

chapter one: lucy

 _ **"Natsu Dragneel, don't you dare!"**_

 _._

 _._

 _In which everything goes to hell on a Monday morning. Lucy's teacher is so not paying attention._

* * *

Lucy Heartfilia is fond of most of her classes. Being a girl best suited for the books, she honestly doesn't mind school. In fact, she enjoys it. In her opinion, school is just another opportunity to read more, and her best friend Levy Mcgarden would definitely agree on the matter.

Save for chemistry.

Not that she had anything against the subject, or her teacher, for any matter.

No, what made that class absolutely horrendous for her was her other best friend, Natsu Dragneel.

And his tendency to set things on fire.

(Things = Gray Fullbuster, by the way.)

Lucy was absolutely done with his games one (not-so) fine Monday morning, so, as she walked into chemistry, she was going to set things straight.

She marched towards Natsu, who, of course, had a block of potassium in his hands and was ready to ever-so casually drop a piece into Gray's water bottle.

 _Oh no._

Lucy was _not_ going to have him completely destroy the science wing.

"Natsu!"

"Oh, hey Lucy!" Natsu quietly slips the block into his pocket.

Lucy's eyes narrow.

"Natsu, it is 7 in the morning, I am not up for the school to explode at 7 in the morning, because _I am still behind on The Flash, and no, I will not deal with this_! _**So for god's sake, hand me that block!**_ "

"Woah, Luce, are you okay? You must be imagining things,"

"No, Natsu, I am not- " Lucy's voice suddenly trails off as their chemistry teacher walks in. Doranbolt was usually a bright, lively man who started the day off with a story about someone stupid on the jury he served, and then continued with the lecture, along with the occasional 80's reference.

Today, however, was different.

As soon as Doranbolt walked in, albeit slower than before, there were at least 10 sluggish, humanoid figures trailing after him.

Lucy and Natsu were confused, to say the least.

"Um, Mr. Doranbolt…"

"Sir…"

Doranbolt turned to face them, but before he could speak, the humanoid figure behind him bit off his head.

 _His head._

Blinking in shock, Lucy and Natsu turned towards each other, blinked again and whispered, _"Zombies."_

Lucy frantically gestured at Natsu to dump the potassium in the water, and then they scrambled to get the hell out of the now smoking crater that used to be called the science wing.

"Wait, Luce, let's go back and get some more potassium, I need to prank Gray."

" _Natsu Dragneel, don't you dare!"_

—

next chapter: "Where the hell is Gray?"


	2. Chapter 2

notes: hi guys, sorry for not updating! i'm just really bitter about not being able to play pokemon go, and i had finals before that!

disclaimer: i don't own the nerds

dedication: to luck, fate's fickle friend!

warning: swearing

chapter two : lucy

 _"Gray. Are you seriously telling me that you missed the dawn of the zombie apocalypse because you were trying to catch a_ ** _Pikachu_** _?!"_

 _._

.

Let's welcome cast member Gray Fullbuster, who has no sense of danger and thinks that catching Pikachu is worth the risk of getting his head bit off.

Lucy and Natsu burst out of the science wing, running as fast as they can. They almost made it to the front of the school, when Lucy remembers -

"We forgot Gray!"

"Fuck Gray, we're going to die if we stay here!"

"What kind of friend are you?"

"One that knows that we are gonna be _nada_ if we go in to find him!"

Lucy decides to pointedly ignore him, speed walking back into the school, whispering Gray's name as loud as she can. Y'know, without attracting the undead. Natsu joins in soon, trying every variation of "icy dumbass" known to mankind.

As they're passing the boy's bathroom near the art wing, they hear rustling in the bushes, as well as a tired and irritated voice, muttering, "No, you electric rat, come here!"

Lucy whips her head around so fast; she's positive she's going to have whiplash.

"Gray?!"

A bush of dark hair pops out of the bush, waving Lucy aside.

"Not now Lucy, can't you see I'm trying to catch Pikachu?"

Lucy is aghast, because she's not sure if Gray just missed the zombie apocalypse because of Pokemon Go.

"Gray."

"Lucy, shhh!"

 **"Gray."**

"Almost there, c'mon Pikachu, be mine, I'll love you forever…"

Natsu shudders, taking a step back, "Dude, that was so creepy."

 **"Gray!"** Lucy finally loses it. **_"WE ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE!"_**

Gray looks surprised, to say the least. "Wait,what? Zombies?"

Lucy looks livid.

"Yes, Gray, zombies. You know, the kind that try to bite off your head?"

Gray is, to mildly put it, confused.

"When did this happen? I've been here the whole day, I didn't see any zombies!"

Lucy looks at her finger nails, and Gray feels like he's at the police station.

"It's very difficult to notice when you're trying to get an electric rat to _be yours,_ Gray."

Gray is aghast as well, but he quickly comes to his senses, jumps out of the bush, and starts high tailing it out of there, momentarily stopping, to make sure that Natsu and Lucy were close behind.

"Where to?" he shouts.

Natsu simply points in the general direction of his house.

"Weapons, food, clothes, we should be able to stock up and then we can find everyone else!"

Gray nods, muttering, "I guess we should be glad that you're a freak obsessed with zombies."

 _"Gray, I will cut you!"_

Lucy, for the tenth billionth time today, pointedly ignores them again. She instead chooses to focus her limited energy on making it to Natsu's house.

Natsu's house looks like something out of a cartoon - meaning that it's a simple, suburban house with the classic front lawn and a driveway. However, it's safe, because Natsu's father is off in the military, meaning that there should be no one there.

Natsu doesn't think so. He strolls into the house; his eyebrows and forehead creased together in either confusion or frustration. Lucy doesn't have the heart to tell him that he'll have premature wrinkles if he keeps this up, so she just shuts up.

"Too fucking easy…" he mutters, eyes looking around warily. Lucy and Gray exchange glances, of course Natsu is treating this like a zombie video game. _Of course._

They open the closet door and each take a weapon. Natsu takes the gun, Lucy takes the axe, and Gray takes the sword. Natsu snidely remarks on zombie guts, but quickly shuts up after Gray and Lucy lift their weapons.

Then they hear the moaning.

"Zombies, I fucking told you it was too fucking easy, and now look! There are zombies! In! My! House! With! Us!"

Natsu is ecstatic (and terrified), and Lucy and Gray are done with the world.

 _"I hate my life,"_ Lucy mutters, before raising her battle axe.

next chapter: "Wait, the fencing captain would actually increase our chances of surviving! You know, assuming that she doesn't kill us first…"

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